A Few Thoughts on Why

The question of why we want to move is often asked, yet rarely answered. Not really. We give vague responses such as:

Why not?

Because we want to.

We're tired of winter.

These are all true. But the deeper answer is much more nuanced than this. It has more to do with curiosity about the world, boredom with our current path, and the excitement of facing a new challenge. We've found that most people we've talked to are less interested in the nuanced reasons and more comfortable with the aforementioned vague responses. Granted, that pool of people is very small at this point. Most of those are individuals that are very close to us that need some time to digest the decision. When the topic is broached, there tends to be a pattern of dismissal, an air of discomfort with the subject. So, we don't push. When they're ready, we'll talk more about it.

There are a couple things we've noticed, however. Members of the older population are much more excited about our decision than those that are younger. We're are by no means "spring chickens", but we aren't close to retirement either. People of older generations often react with some form of "I wish I had done that" response. They tend to be more engaged and interested in the idea. Those that are younger seem to regard the conversation with disbelief, a skepticism of sorts. I don't have any real evidence as to why the generation gap seems to have an impact, but I have my own theories. Not that I spend much time contemplating these. Far be it for me to interject my own assumptions on why others think or react the way they do. Why spend time projecting our own thoughts on someone else? Besides, that's not really fair to the other party. There are a few misconceptions about why we are leaving that I can clear up without the risk of assumptions.

We Are Unhappy

Not even close. In fact, if we were unhappy, that would be a big reason NOT to go. In my humble opinion, a major life change is not often the best catalyst to address run-of-the-mill unhappiness. That is not to say positive outcomes do not come from some of the biggest changes in life. All outcomes have one thing in common - they are what you make of them. What I'm talking about here is personal unhappiness - job, marriage, etc. Extreme unhappiness in these areas are so often much more about the individual than the situation. Again, I am not dismissing extreme circumstances for which the previous statement is untrue. All I am saying is that we are very happy and that is a reason to go (for us), rather than a reason to stay. Are there things we don't like in our jobs? Sure. Are there areas where we could improve personally? Absolutely. Is our current location dangerous or untenable? Not at all. We're in a pretty good place in all of these categories. This move isn't an effort to fix anything.

We Want To Reinvent Ourselves

We've run into this assumption that we want to become different people. Not even a chance. We are who we are and harbor no illusions that we will become entirely different people simply because we adjust our location. Nor do we want to. Will we grow? I hope so. But who we are as individuals and as a couple will still, at the core, remain. Reinvention, no.

Reintroduction? Absolutely. We are very conscientious of the behavior expectations and social norms that currently dictate the part of us we feel can be offered to the public world in which we currently reside. We feel obliged to follow these guidelines - most of the time. It can be exhausting to not only try to contort ourselves into this box, but also at times to explain why we don't want to. Part of our decision spawned from the idea that perhaps a new location would allow us to relax, to live a less guarded life somewhat dictated by others expectations. Could we do this here? Sure. But a new, more relaxed, environment could be more conducive to this adjustment.

We Hate Snow

Not really. There are things we like about snow. As a younger person, I loved snow. Days off of school. Cozy evenings with hot cocoa, a fireplace, and a good book or movie. The holidays. I was crazy about Christmas as a kid. I used to make paper snowflakes, cover them in glitter, and hang them from my bedroom ceiling. These combined with the twinkle lights I'd hang in my room would make for a beautiful, beautiful evening staring at the ceiling. Often an evening dreaming of what it would be like to exist somewhere else. The curious explorer in me did not pop up overnight. The snow was not the motivating factor for these dreams. I will, however, admit that I am not as in love with snow now as I was then. I'm older. I have to commute on icy roads. My joints ache in the cold. These are factors in choosing location, but not the reason we want to move.

Winter 2013

Winter 2013

We Hate Our Jobs

I am, admittedly, not as in love with my 9-5 as I once was. But that does not mean I hate it so much I feel the only answer is to move across the world. How silly would that be? It's going to be very difficult to say goodbye to 98% of the people I see and/or work with on a daily basis. I am really fortunate to work with some fantastic people. They make the less pleasant aspects of my role worth it. No, I'm not running away screaming from my current employment situation. I just want to explore something different.

Those are the biggest misconceptions we've run into thus far. I'm sure the list will expand as the number of people we let in on our "little secret" grows.